


Denial

by thespianlesbian



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: F/F, LET MY BOYS BE HAPPY 2K17, M/M, Tree Bros, also again i like my boys happy so connor and zoe are on ok terms, also i luv zoe she's a star, lil to no angst bc im sad enough without this depressing musical, theres a zoe/alana fic coming soon, this is a fun lil thing that i might make multi chaptered who knows
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-17
Updated: 2017-06-17
Packaged: 2018-11-15 04:00:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11222871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thespianlesbian/pseuds/thespianlesbian
Summary: based on the tumblr prompt,person A: how come he (B) still hasn’t understood that I like him?person C: all you do is stare at him like a creep, and when you’re actually talking to each other, you’re mean to him-person A: hey, no, i’m not mean! that’s me flirtingperson C: oh, boy





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hi hello here's some kinda happy tree bros (again did not proofread pls dont kill me)

Sure, okay. Maybe Connor’s been looking at the boy slightly more than usual during lunch. But that doesn’t mean anything. Evan’s just in his line of sight. It has absolutely _nothing_ to do with Evan Hansen’s beautiful blue eyes that he refuses to use to match Connor’s, or the blush on Evan’s cheeks whenever he does accidentally meet his own, and it certainly has nothing to do with his simile and how it definitely does not turn Connor’s stomach upside down. Evan Hansen just happens to be in the very spot where Connor eyes land when he zones out. Absolutely nothing more.

“What about Wednesday night?”

“No, I have a jazz band concert at 6.”

“Oh, do you want me to come?”

Zoe and her girlfriend Alana had sat down without even acknowledging Connor. It’s weird that Zoe just mentioned one of the biggest concerts she has lined up for her this semester to Alana. Cynthia can’t stop fucking posting on Facebook about how excited she is. However he didn’t think too much of it then. “Nah, don’t worry about it. It’s nothing big.” His sister shrugged as she pulled her lunch out of her bookbag. Connor glanced at Zoe and the look she gave him made it clear that he shouldn’t bring anything about the concert up. Turns out he didn’t even get the chance since Alana had already moved on to talking about her Civics class.

Jared Kleinman had sat down across from Evan, blocking Connor’s view view of the other boy. Connor rolled his eyes and scowled. Of course it was fucking Kleinman. He sighed and threw the fry that was in his hand down on his plate. “That was an angsty french fry toss, what’s got you in your feelings?” Zoe raised an eyebrow at him. He looked between Zoe and Alana and he knew he wasn’t getting out of this one. “How come he hasn’t understood that I like him?” Connor asked. He’s mentioned his little, tiny, crush on Evan to Zoe once or twice, and the fact that Alana didn’t seem confused or lost in the slightest suggests that Zoe brought it up to her girlfriend once or twice as well. His little sister sighed, “All you do is stare at him like a creep, and when you’re actually talking to each other, you’re mean to him-” Before she could continue Connor interjected, “Hey, no, I’m not _mean!_ That’s me flirting!” There was a moment of silence. “Oh, boy.” Zoe sighed while Alana looked like she was trying her hardest to not laugh or cry. “Didn’t you shove him at one point?” Connor looked at Alana like she lost her mind, but before he could actually say anything Zoe swooped into defend her girl. “Yeah, I absolutely saw you shove him to the floor. That seriously cannot be your way of flirting.” Connor rolled his eyes, again. “What the fuck ever, I’m done. Who gives a shit if I’m a terrible flirt or not, he’d never like me anyways. He’s probably fucking Kleinman.” Connor whisper yelled before grabbing his lunch tray and moving to throw it away. He looked at Evan before he left, and the smaller boy actually looked back at him. Evan quickly looked away with a slight tint of red on his cheeks. Fuck this, Connor thought as he stormed out of the cafeteria.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> connor tries his best and evan has a panic attack

“Don’t look now but the school shooter’s staring at you.” Instead of an orthodox ‘hello’ this is how Jared Kleinman chose to greet his only friend as he sat down directly across from him. “Don’t call him that! But yes. I uh. I noticed.” Evan turned red, “Do you think he hates me? I don’t know what I could’ve done, we’ve barely spoken! How could I have fucked up already?” He just sounded so pitiful, Jared decided to go easy on the nervous boy. “I’m sure you didn’t do anything, Ev. Connor Murphy’s just a psychopath, that’s all.” He shrugged while Evan looked unconvinced. 

“Hey, did you hear we have to present our project in Civics?”

“W-What?!” 

Evan was preoccupied with stressing himself out over this fucking presentation that he forgot all about Connor. That is until the aforementioned boy looked right at him. Evan felt his cheeks heat up as Connor stared at him. Evan looked down to avoid the taller boy’s gaze. Jesus Christ this day is shit. First he has to make a speech in front of the whole class and now Connor hates him. What if his class already hates him? Apparently it isn’t that difficult to despise Evan, since he managed to get Connor Murphy against him without having a fucking single conversation with him. Evan felt his heart in his throat. He heard Jared speaking to him but he couldn’t make out what he was saying. He felt as if everyone was looking at him, like everyone was whispering about him, laughing at him to their friends. Evan felt his heart slam against his ribs. He got significantly hotter, he was probably red and sweaty and just overall gross. He heard Jared call his name, but he didn’t acknowledge it. He couldn’t speak. He just got up, and tried not to make too much of a scene as he rushed out of the cafeteria. 

 

________

 

“Connor, you’re delusional.”

“Fuck off, Zoe.”

“You’re being a little bitch.”

“Fuck you!” 

“Alright you two, this isn’t going anywhere.” Alana quickly interjected before the Murphy siblings heighten this little dispute into a full blown fight. Alana has only witnessed one fight between the siblings, and it ended with Zoe locking herself in her room and Connor banging and kicking the door while screaming death threats at her. Alana has never seen Zoe so broken after that fight. No matter how much therapy the siblings attend to attempt to fix their disturbed relationship, she’ll forget Connor’s threats and how he almost kicked the door down, or the look on Zoe’s face when Alana finally got into the room. She’s never heard her girlfriend sob so loudly before. Alana had to shake that memory out of her mind and focus on calming down the two.

“You know Connor, maybe you could try being unconditionally nice to him.” Alana put on a bright smile hoping to deflect whatever kind of outlash Connor might have. “What do you mean? I _am_ nice to hi-” Alana was quick to cut him off, “I mean, be nice to him in ways he can’t confuse it for something else. It’s not a secret that Evan has anxiety, he’s going to overthink all of your interactions unless you give him reasons to trust you.” Connor didn’t have anything to shoot down her suggestion with, so she took it as a victory. “Okay. Since you two seem to fucking know it all about romance, what do I need to do?” He sounded annoyed. Alana frowned as she thought.

“Hey! I didn’t see him in fourth period. Don’t you two have third period together? If he wasn’t there in third you could give the notes he missed.” Zoe suggested to which Connor rolled his eyes. “I skipped third.” He muttered. Before Zoe could start yelling at her brother again, Alana sprung from her spot on the living room couch and got her backpage from across the room. “You’re lucky we share a third block and I _always_ take notes.” She said as she pulled out her note sheet for Connor to copy. “Okay, but wouldn’t he just ask you for the notes and not me?” Connor asked as Alana handed him the notes. “Because you’re going to ask him for the notes before he gets the chance to ask Alana.” Zoe said, and Connor looked like he was going to be sick. “Oh, good.” He replied sarcastically. 

 

______________

Evan had made it past his presentation in first block. Even though he skipped the rest of that block and all of second to have a panic attack in the bathroom, he actually survived it without resembling the human embodiment of embarrassment. He just seemed like a pathetic kid with an awful stutter. He can live with that, since that’s exactly what he is. 

He walked into third block and took his usual seat. He instantly went to pull out his notebook and look at the warm up on the whiteboard. Evan took one look at the problem and wanted to scream. He didn’t go to math yesterday because he called his mother and told him he wasn’t feeling well so she called the school and made Jared give him a ride home. He skipped school to have a panic attack, and now he has no idea what he’s doing in math. He only missed one day, and now the problem on the board looks like fucking Spanish. Scratch that, Evan actually understands Spanish better than he does the math problem. This means he was going to have to ask Alana for the notes. Granted, it’s easier to talk to Alana because she did most of the talking, he still hated asking. He figured now was his time to ask since class was about to start. However, before he could ask someone slammed a piece of paper on his desk. Evan was pretty sure he jumped so badly if it hadn’t been his hand on the edge on the desk. “Um, here are the notes from yesterday.” Evan looked up to see Connor Murphy with his hand on his desk, towering over him. “W-what?” Evan stuttered without making eye contact with him. “You weren’t here yesterday. Here are the notes.” Connor said matter of factly. “O-Oh, um, y-yeah, I, um, thank you? This is actually k-kinda nice an-” Connor looked like a suicidal tomato as he cut Evan off, “Yeah okay whatever you’re welcome I guess also I have to leave right now.” He said so quickly Evan could barely make out what he was saying, and then he dashed out the door. Evan sighed. 

Fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so yay this is a chapter thing now!!
> 
> also pls leave comments and kudos so i feel validated

**Author's Note:**

> so this might be a multi chaptered fic???? i might continue this from connors pov until he finally gets the boy or maybe do the same scenario from evans pov?? idk let me know if this is actually worth making more chapters of this lmao


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